I asked myself once before in regard to a particular situation, what are the criteria we use when deciding if something is worth it? I think I’ve discovered what my main criterion are. I can’t believe I didn’t realize it sooner, honestly. The main way I determine if something is worth it is, does it feel worth it?
That’s right, forget logic, forget what other people are telling you, showing you, forget whatever doubts or confidences you have in it, does it feel worth it? If your heart isn’t in it in whatever way it needs to be, then there is no way you can really give the situation the thought and attention it deserves. And your intuition, perhaps, will not lie to you.
And the situation I was referring to in “All the Wrong Reasons” is not the topic of discussion here. It was the basis for the idea, but this is not about the situation presented in “All the Wrong Reasons.” This is about doing what you feel is the best for the situation, not what you think is the best. Thinking and feeling are two VERY different things, and though not everyone is like me, I am more often than not ruled by my feelings rather than logic. The few most recent times I have let logic lead me, I have found that it wasn’t the best choice because my heart wasn’t in it. I can’t complain, though, since the logical choices helped me realize where my heart was and ultimately helped lead me to the choice I should have made in the first place. But if I had made the feeling choice then, would things have changed? Would I have learned and gained as much? Unlikely.
I have hurt and disappointed people in my logical choices. The two most recent logical choices caused some people I care about greatly to be hurt, and for that I am sorry. But I don’t think I would have understood the feelings behind my decisions if I hadn’t followed the logical choice first. And sometime, some things just don’t go away, they don’t leave, the don’t change. There is nothing that can change a feeling except time, and even with that, they didn’t change. That is how I know when something is worth it.
Maybe your criteria are different. Maybe not. It doesn’t matter, I have made an effort to go into things knowing that my heart is 100% in it. And if it’s not, it’s not really fair to anyone or anything involved, least of all myself. I have made a few big decisions recently. They are ones that I am not going to renege on, as they feel and have felt right for quite some time, it just took me a bit to realize it. And I no longer feel bad for abandoning things, walking away, turning around, because I know that what I feel is right is more important than what logically appears right. This is what is right for me, what is the best for me. I am not saying this works for everybody, but this is how I work.
A connecting principle, linked to the invisible.
